Chapter 38: Party In The USA

As I mentioned in the midst of all my emo rantings in last night's post, I've started working on learning to play a second song on the keyboard, "Party In The USA" by Miley Cyrus. I've pretty much mastered the playing of it at this point and am working on trying to sing as I play. Now, I know it sounds like a pretty silly choice for my second song to learn but the more I've worked on it today the more I've realized how appropriate it really is. As I was playing the bridge, and singing the lyrics along with it, I really started to feel like I should call and leave it as a voicemail on Don's phone. "I feel like jumping on a flight back to my home town tonight, but something stops me every time, the DJ plays my song and I feel alright..." Again, I understand that these are cheesy lyrics but they say exactly what I am feeling right now. It is really starting to concern me that I tried to call Don last weekend, left him a message and haven't heard back from him. I tried him again earlier today and left another message. I have really been wanting to talk to him lately and it seems like I am having trouble getting through to him. It feels like such a recurring theme in my life lately; I can't seem to get through to anyone. Most people, though, I would say are considerably less important than Don. I would be absolutely devastated if I lost him, especially now that I am finally going to be living in the same state as him again. I am kind of obsessing over this, (as evidenced by the fact that I stopped writing this for a few minutes to go send him a message on Facebook confirming that his phone number is still the same,) and need to stop. Don is fine, and he will call me back when the time is absolutely right for him to share in the news and be joyful about it with me!

I woke up around 2:30pm today, which is a very bad thing. I am determined to make sure that doesn't effect my sleep tonight and my waking up tomorrow morning, though. I spent the bulk of the day working on "Party In The USA," on the keyboard and catching up on some TV watching. I watched the last episode of "V" for the fall season, which was excellent. I am really liking that show. It is different from most stuff that I watch, but is very interesting and full of crazy twists and turns. The crazy twists and turns part is probably what keeps me watching, because that tends to be a common thread with all of the different shows I follow. The difference is that the crazy twists and turns on "V" are things like aliens putting strange chemicals into the nations supply of flu shots, as opposed to Serena Van Der Woodsen deciding to run away with a married congressman or something like that. Still, it was very good. I also watched "Carrie Underwood: An All-Star Holiday Special," which was brilliant! It was two hours of Carrie Underwood performing songs off her new album, "Play On" and doing silly sketches involving her family and other, random celebrities. My favorite bit, though, was Carrie, Kristin Chenoweth and Christina Applegate doing a tribute to 60s girl groups. I have always been a fan of the music of that era, particularly the girl groups and artists like Lesley Gore. As we were watching this, my Mom and I were discussing the fact that it seemed like such a simpler time then, and the world was much more innocent and far less jaded. It was a time when people were considerably more trusting of their fellow man. My Mom was saying that she always thought it would have been cool to live in that era. I think it would be, too, in some ways, but you also have to remember that this was also a time when segregation was still standing strong in many places and people like me, homosexuals, were forced to remain closeted. While it was a much more innocent time, it was a time filled with much more hatred. Actually, I don't know that the hatred then was any more present than it is now but it was certainly more widely accepted and thought of as a social norm. I would not want to live in that time. I do love the music, though. The really big coup in this Carrie Underwood special, though, was Dolly Parton. Dolly is, and always will be, an amazing woman and a great inspiration to me. I think, in many ways, Dolly Parton is more than just a musician; she is a modern day philosopher. I absolutely adore her. On this Carrie Underwood special she also stated that she is working on a musical based on her life and is working on getting Kristin Chenoweth to play her. This is, for me, one of the best pieces of news I could have heard. Dolly has led an amazing life and a musical would be the perfect arena for her to tell her story in and it would be an amazing way for Kristin Chenoweth to make a grand return to Broadway.

Aside from that, I also kind of started learning a new song on the keyboard, "Love Story" by Taylor Swift. I have always said that this is a song that I would like to cover in my first live performance as an artist. I would introduce it as "a song about growing up gay in the south," and not reveal what the song is to the audience before starting it. I know that sounds a little odd but I have always related that song to the experience of a gay teen in a small town. In fact, I have always thought that, in a lot of ways, Taylor Swift writes many of her songs from a gay perspective. She writes a lot of songs about being an outsider and about forbidden love and things of that nature, all things that the gay youth can definitely relate to. I think that is a large part of what has made her such a hit within the gay community, who is not always known for being the biggest fans of country music. I guess that's not entirely true, though. Many female country artists, like Dolly, Reba, Faith Hill, Shania Twain and, more recently, Carrie Underwood have all become major gay icons. Taylor Swift seems to be well on her way to reaching that status, as well. I think that is a very good thing. It kind of serves to show the world that we are just as varied and come in as many different shapes and sizes as straight people do. Aside from the fact that her music evokes a lot of the gay perspective, I also want to cover the song because it is a favorite of mine and Taylor is one of my favorite artists nowadays. My concept for a live show includes a lot of cover songs that would seem really ridiculous coming from an artist like me and would be familiar and get a laugh out of the audience. Pop songs, mainly, presented in the same style as my original music, which isn't really pop. Kind of like what Alanis Morissette did with her cover of "My Humps," but less pointing-and-laughing at the songs. I wouldn't want to cover anything that I don't really love personally, though. It's not about being silly or poking fun at the songs so much as it is about giving people a different perspective on them. "Love Story" would be a perfect example of that. Another song that I have always wanted to cover is "With Love" by Hilary Duff, because I think it is a song with a very positive message to spread but that message gets overlooked with the big production on the original version. The only song I would cover in a poking fun at it sort of way would be "Wake Up Call" by Hayden Panettierre. It's a very catchy, fun pop song but the lyrics are absolutely ridiculous and I think slowing the song down and making it sound very serious would really expose the hilarity held in the lyrics. The song is basically about trying to get the attention of a neglectful boyfriend by going out and cheating on him with other guys. This is a terrible concept and advice that should never be followed. It doesn't work, and I know this from personal experience, (which is a story for another day, really.)

My Mom and I got dinner tonight from our favorite place, Gyros & Seafood, (pronounced Jai-Ros and Seafood.) It was delicious, but I think I ate a little too much. I had a Seafood Scampi dinner, with shrimp, talapia, yellow rice and hush puppies, and something just didn't sit right with me. I have felt a little funky ever since. I don't think there was actually any one item that made me feel this way, but it was the fact that I ate too much of each one... okay, and some cheese fries, which always sound like a great idea but rarely are. I probably should have controlled myself a little more with that dinner. Oh well, it's nothing a good night's sleep won't cure. Speaking of which, I should probably get to that good night's sleep pretty soon. Tomorrow is the start of another full week of work. There's just this week and then two short weeks, thanks to the holidays falling on Fridays this year. Speaking of holidays, I have managed to convince my family not to do gifts this year. I mean, my sister and her girlfriend, my brother and his girlfriend and my mom and her boyfriend are all buying for each other, but I have convinced them that we don't all need to buy gifts for everyone. It is kind of a sad thing, in some ways, because they all have somebody to exchange gifts with individually and I don't. I am okay with this, though, because I have come to the realization that I don't need any gifts. I have been given the greatest gift I could ever receive: the gifts I was given at birth, that I have carried with me throughout my entire life; the gifts of music, talent, passion, drive and dreams. The best gift of them all, though, is the determination to make the dreams come true and put all of the other gifts to good use. As much as it may not be the humble way to look at things, I am an incredibly gifted person and I really don't need anything more than I already have. Anything else I may want, as far as possessions go, I can get for myself. I am very glad that this issue has been resolved, though, because I have not bought any gifts for anybody and now I know I don't really need to. Plus, thanks to my Mom's crafty thinking, I have a gift that will last me for the rest of my life: I am learning to play, and eventually write, music. That is the greatest gift possible because it is something that is going to help me move closer and closer to making my dreams come true.

Now, though, it is time for bed.