Chapter 34: Take A Walk

It was a long day. I had my alarm set for 7am, so I could get in on the radio contest at that hour, (I didn't win,) but I actually wound up waking up before the alarm went off. It was 6:40am, but the house was pitch black and I had to double check my phone to make sure I hadn't accidentally woken up at 4am and should be going back to sleep. That was not the case, though, and I stayed up. I hate the guy on the radio station in the morning. He talks too much, pushes the call-in contest to the very end and instead of asking for caller 93, like they do every other time, he'll just kind of abruptly say, "Okay, right now, caller number 9." Caller number 9 doesn't give you any time at all to call. By the time my first call goes through, they probably already have a caller number 9. That is really annoying. Of course, this evening during the 8pm hour 93 wasn't any luckier for me. I have gotten through numerous times over the past few days and been caller number 30, 63, 51, 74, etc. This evening, though, I got closer than ever; Caller number 90! FUCKING THREE CALLERS EARLY! I was so pissed! That is just plain frustrating. Oh, well, I've got two, possibly three, more days to win!

Work wasn't quite as boring today as it has been lately and I think the reason is that we weren't as busy as we have been lately. As I've said a few times before, being busy doesn't make the day pass any faster at all for me. It only makes it worse. I prefer days like today, where we aren't completely dead but not overly busy, either. It works well for me because I am able to spend periods of my day talking to my co-workers, drawing or writing and finding random ways to entertain myself. That makes the day pass much quicker for me than constantly being on a call does. I did have an interesting chat with my sister today, though, about how I don't really intend to pursue the position that I had tried for before, or another possibility that may be coming up soon. It was the first time I have really gotten the chance to sit down with my sister and really explain to her that I am serious about moving to California. We talked a little more about the job market out there, which is really no worse than the job market is here, and my plans for trying to get my driver's license before I leave. She didn't really have a whole lot to say about it, but I think that she understands where I'm coming from. It's really important to me that the people I care about the most here really understand why I am doing this and that it isn't just some frivolous idea I came up with. I feel really strongly about all of this, as anyone who has read this blog must realize. My Mom did just tell me, though, that she really thinks I should get in touch with my Uncle who I am hoping to stay with out there. I understand what she is saying, but I kind of don't want to talk to them about it until things get more settled here. I am obviously already committed to the plan in my head but, as I stated before, there is one thing that is holding me back from feeling 100% about it. I basically want to wait until I feel more secure about what my Mom is doing here before I start making ACTUAL plans with the people out there. I don't want it to be another thing that I decide, tell everyone about and then never follow through on. So, I am waiting for the signal from the universe that my Mom is prepared for it before I start actually preparing for it myself. The best signal of that would be a better paying job that she may actually like. Speaking of which, her interview on Monday went well. They sent her to their Human Resources department, who said they would have to check her references and would get back to her. She hasn't heard from them yet. Her boyfriend and I both told her that she should give them this week, then call them to follow up on Monday. I really hope she gets this job. It sounds pretty perfect for her and, while it doesn't pay as much as her previous job, will be a major upgrade from her job at the place that shall not be named for security purposes. I think it would be an excellent jumping off point for her to be stable enough to allow for me to move. We'll see. Keep your fingers crossed, please. I know I am.

This morning, before work, my Mom and I discussed that we would try to synchronize enough that when I get off she would be taking her last break and could drive me home. Unfortunately, that didn't work out very well. I got a call at 5:58pm, (two minutes before the end of my shift,) and was stuck there until 6:15pm, when my Mom was coming back from her break. My sister initially offered to get in touch with her girlfriend and try to see if she could come pick me up, but I told her not to. I figured, since my previous ride is no longer available, I should acquaint myself with the way home by foot. No time like the present to take the first step. It really isn't that far, and I made it home in less than a half hour. Fortunately, the entire walk from my job to my house is very well-lit and I didn't have much problem with paranoia that somebody may jump out of the darkness and attack me; note the worse of the word MUCH. It is irrational, I know, but walking alone in the dark is always a little scary. Not scary enough to stop me from doing it when necessary, but when you walk like I do and are wearing a very clear Lady GaGa t-shirt and carrying a "man bag," you kind of have to be slightly concerned about what may pop out of the darkness. Sadly, my main concern was the fact that I am so well-dressed and clearly gay and thinking that people would think I would be an easy mark for attack. I didn't pull out my cell phone or iPod for the entire walk home just in case. I think I may, for the future, start carrying a pair of headphones with me for days when I do have to walk home. It wasn't a bad walk, and I actually kind of enjoyed it, but it would have been much nicer with some music along the way. Plus, I have this really cute pair of bedazzled earbud headphones that came packaged with the "Gossip Girl" season 2 DVD, so it would be nice to get some use out of them. It is very rare that I actually use headphones because most of my iPod use is done either with a pair of speakers I got for Christmas a few years ago or in the car, with one of those sets that you plug into the tape deck of the car, (My Mom drives a Hybrid, which comes stock with a tape deck,) so these special Gossip Girl headphones have never actually been used. So, that could be nice. Despite the fact that I wore the worst possible shoes for it today, I really kind of enjoyed walking home. I could feel it in my legs and thighs, which means I was getting a halfway decent workout, too. Overall, I think it was a very good thing that I intend to make a habit of.

Once I got home, I was pretty worn out and spent a good hour sitting on the couch watching the DVRd TV shows of the day, Chelsea Lately from last night and The View from this morning. Julianne Moore was a guest on The View and I always find her pretty interesting. She was there to promote the film, "A Single Man," which is the directorial debut by Tom Ford, former designer for Gucci. His work with Gucci, as far as design and marketing, was always pretty breathtaking and brilliant. Taking that visual sense into the medium of film, I think, should have an absolutely gorgeous outcome. Visually, I imagine this film will be stunning. The story sounds pretty amazing, as well. The film stars Colin Firth as a gay man mourning the loss of his lover. I don't know all the details of the story, but I know that Colin Firth is a brilliant actor, Julianne Moore is a brilliant actress and Tom Ford is a brilliant man, in general, so I expect big things out of this film. I am excited for it's release nationwide and can't wait to go see it in a theater; most likely our local indie/foreign/arthouse destination, Burns Court. I love that theater and have been wanting to go for the past few weeks, ever since I heard that they had "Coco Before Chanel" there. If they get "A Single Man" I will definitely make it a point to get down there. For a movie theater, considering they are not generally places you give much thought to, it has a certain atmosphere. I'm not sure what it is exactly, but I really like it there and hope to pay it a few more visits before I leave this city. Speaking of The View, tonight was also Barbara Walters "10 Most Fascinating People of 2009" special. I don't normally make it a point to watch these simply because they aren't all that interesting and she spends an hour giving each of these fascinating people only a minute or two of screen time. However, I did make it a point to watch this year because of two of the choices for most fascinating people: Adam Lambert and Lady GaGa. Sadly, this year's special didn't break the formula of only a minute or two of screen time for them, but GaGa absolutely made the most of the time that she had and came across as amazing as always. Adam, on the other hand, really seemed like 3 or 4 soundbites and a few clips of him on Idol. None of it was anything anybody hasn't heard before, which was disappointing. It was still enjoyable, though, and it was good to see Adam getting some positive recognition. I am excited to see his performance on The View tomorrow, as well. It seems that ABC may be slowly attempting to mend fences with him, which is a good thing. I am also really glad to hear that the second single from his album, "Whataya Want From Me," is doing much better than "For Your Entertainment" did. I still think "Music Again" should have been the first single, but I can be satisfied with it being the third single instead. I am really keeping my fingers crossed that it will be. I am also keeping my fingers crossed that I will win one of these fucking radio contests and meet him next weekend... I guess we'll just have to wait and see on both of those matters, though.

For now, though, it is after midnight and I am completely exhausted. I need to get to bed, especially considering how early I got up this morning and how early I plan on getting up tomorrow morning. I figure I may as well take every opportunity I have to call the radio station in attempts to win those Jingle Ball tickets. I am keeping my fingers crossed for it so hard! Wait, that is already three sets of fingers that I have crossed in this post. I think that is definitely a sign that I should get to bed.