Chapter 135: Hook Me Up

After spending the past couple days basically skipping the blog for lack of anything to say and lack of energy to sit in front of the computer long enough to write it, I am making my grand return to the full-length, written blog. I would attempt to do a little bit of a catch-up on the past couple days here but the postings from the past two days, in spite of their small sizes, really kind of captured it. They may have been lacking in any major content, but so have the past two days. The past two days were completely consumed of sickness. I watched TV, last night I joined in Nate’s BlogTV chat again and talked about Lady Gaga a lot, as discussed in last night’s video blog. Speaking of Nate’s BlogTV chat and last night’s video blog, these two things kind of inspired me to take on a new project that I am pretty excited about. You see, while in Nate’s BlogTV a guy in there who I have met a time or two in the past told me that I should start my own BlogTV account, as well. I was like, “Whatever, I couldn’t pull off the live broadcast thing,” and pretty much dismissed the idea. I did tell Nate, though, that he should let me come and guest co-host with him. He was very dismissive of the idea, which I was initially offended by, but he also said that he was pretty sure that I could do my own show and get a ton more viewers than he does. I don’t know if that’s true, per se, but it did get me thinking a bit. Like I mentioned above, I don’t know that I could pull off the live broadcast type format and I don’t know that I would really want to work in that way, but I do kind of think that video would be the next logical step for me. As I have discussed a few times in the past here, I had been making plans to create a short film but that concept isn’t really panning out the way I had hoped. Don’t get me wrong, I still intend to make a short film but I don’t intend to make the short film that I had conceptualized initially. I was planning a short film companion to this blog and the record I intend to write around it, which would be a selection of captured moments from the year set to the music I will write based on the blog. That concept is pretty much dead to me now, though. I haven’t captured any moments and, sadly, I don’t foresee capturing any in the future. Why is that? Well, I had initially conceived the year in which this blog is taking place to be one that was eventful and involving a lot of other people. This year, however, has turned into something completely different. I don’t see a lot of other people these days, but life is remaining pretty eventful in ways that I hadn’t imagined before. It is still really early in the year, but I am guessing that the story of this year is one of growth and transition – my growth into and transition from misguided kid to genuine artist. At this point, only one third of the way through the year, that is the way that I see the story taking shape. I could be wrong, though. We’ll see.

After doing last night’s video blog about the many ways that Gaga has inspired me, I started thinking about a lot of different artists and designers and pop stars and celebrities who have been an inspiration to me. I also started thinking about the regular shows you see on YouTube, with people talking shit and making fun of different celebrities and artists and such, and just felt that there is really a lot of negativity on YouTube and the internet, in general. I try my best to be a positive force in all of my social networking, blogging and other activities online. It is my goal to be an inspiration to and positive influence on people, so it only seems logical to turn that into my very own weekly show on YouTube. The concept I came up with is a sort of “Weekly Inspiration” type show, where each week I select a different celebrity or artist of some sort who I feel is a positive force in the world and an inspiration to me. Basically, it is a way to highlight the positive influence and actions that various people take in their lives. Since the world we live in is not one that puts an emphasis on the positive acts that celebrities and artists perform, it seems to me like it would be a good idea to try to put a spotlight on these things and try to put something a little more positive out into the Universe. I figured it would only make sense for inspiration to be the topic of my show because it tends to be the topic of this blog and so much of what I think about and talk about in life – how often have you read this blog and found me going on and on about how this person or that person has inspired me so much? It just makes sense to me. So, I made a small video kind of introducing the concept and opening myself up to feedback from people, which can be viewed here - please check it out and let me know what you think of the idea or if you have any suggestions or recommendations for people who inspire you in one way or another.

By the time I fell asleep last night, which took me a very long time to do, I was pretty much feeling better. I wasn’t entirely back at 100% but I was heaps better than I had been earlier in the day. I woke up this morning at 10:48am to very loud knocking at the door. It was the mailman. I had received notice last week that I had a piece of registered mail that needed to be signed for and after one failed attempt had scheduled my last chance redelivery for today. I specifically slept on the couch last night so I would be right by the door and hear when the mailman knocked and, fortunately, the night of awkward positioning was well worth it! The registered mail was an Ebay item I had purchased about a month ago – a lavender-colored John Galliano t-shirt being shipped from Hong Kong. It took about a month for this item to arrive but now that it is here I definitely think it was worth the wait! The first thing that struck me as I ripped the package open was the John Galliano bag it came in, just like my when I ordered my Calvin Klein messenger bag and it came wrapped in a cellophane bag with the Calvin Klein logo all over it. This was exactly the same but with John Galliano. I only mention this because this is yet another way that I am trying to convince myself that my John Galliano shirt is genuine and not a cheap bootleg. If anybody reading this has reason to think otherwise, please leave me in my ignorant bliss and don’t mention it to me. This shirt is so gorgeous, honestly. I am in love with it. Of course, the second thing that struck me about it was how small it seemed. I touched the fabric, though, and it didn’t feel like your usual t-shirt. I gave it a little tug and realized that it stretched. I tried the shirt on and found that it fit but was skintight. Based on the fabric, I am guessing it is supposed to be that way and that all the sizes run small for that reason. Again, this is me convincing myself that it is still okay to wear even though it fits less like a t-shirt and more like a glove… a latex glove. Honestly, I don’t really care if it isn’t supposed to be that way – I am going to wear it, anyway. It is just too cute to not be put on display.

After a day and a half of being sick and not doing much of anything, I decided to take a long hot shower this afternoon and shave. After the shower and shave, I got dressed and did makeup, which I didn’t do yesterday and kind of missed after only a day of not doing it. My Mom and I had planned to go out and pick up a few things after she got out of work for the day and I figured it’d be best to go ahead and get dressed and ready, even though she had no idea what time she was getting off. She wound up getting off at 4:30pm and we left the house around 5pm. The first thing we did was go to the “Super” Target on University because I had wanted to pick up one of their new Sonia Kashuk makeup brush sets that I had seen online. They had some really cute sets of decent quality brushes for very fair prices, so if you happen to be in the market for makeup brushes I would recommend checking it out. I also wanted to pick up a couple of DVDs today. I have gotten really used to buying DVDs that are Previously Viewed 3 or 4 for $20 from Blockbuster and have felt kind of awkward about paying full price for DVDs for a while now but there were a couple things that I wanted to pick up and didn’t want to wait a month or so for Blockbuster to put in their Previously Viewed bins. As lame as it may be, I had to pick up “The Twilight Saga: New Moon,” in the Target Exclusive 3-Disc Deluxe Edition. I had initially planned on buying the Borders Exclusive edition because it comes in special packaging that matches the Borders Exclusive edition of “Twilight,” which is what I have and I wanted them to match, however I realized that was silly when I saw that the Target Exclusive one had a third disc of bonus materials and was $10 less than the Borders one. I figured the extra bonus materials and lower price were worth more than special packaging. This is a silly thing to be discussing, though. I also picked up the movie “Up In The Air,” because I absolutely loved it when I watched it online and have been dying to see it again. It is, by far, one of my favorite films of 2009 and it is a shame that it didn’t receive the recognition it deserved from the Film Academy. It was a very competitive year, though – had it come out in 2008, I’m fairly certain it would have made a pretty broad sweep of the Oscars ceremony. Oh well, though. I do, however, highly recommend that everybody check out this film – it is absolutely brilliant and a huge inspiration. George Clooney’s character in the film, Ryan Bingham, was somebody that I was able to relate to in a huge way and I think a lot of people will be able to see a lot of themselves in him. I don’t know what else to say except that I absolutely recommend watching this film.

While we were down in the plaza on University where the Super Target is I couldn’t resist making a stop in to one of my favorite stores, Ulta. I needed to pick up some brush cleaner and was also looking for some decent quality glitter shadows, as well as continuing on my tireless search for a good pink shadow. Don’t get me wrong – I’ve got good pink shadows. I’ve got a few good pink shadows but they are all lighter shades of pink, like cotton candy type pinks, or darker shades of pink, like mauves and almost-but-not-quite reds. I have been looking for a decent quality hot pink and it seems like it is impossible! I tried looking at the more expensive brands today, like Urban Decay and Too Faced, but they were no better than Maybelline or L’oreal in terms of shades of pink. That search continues still. I did find a really cool glitter crème palette from Nyx Cosmetics, which I have been intending to check out, anyway, because they are the sponsors of “RuPaul’s Drag Race,” and are the makeup that the queens on that show use. Those drag queens have been a big inspiration to me, in terms of makeup, and every time I watch that show I get really envious of their glitter shadows, so I am pretty excited to give this palette a try. I also found a trio of two shades of purple I didn’t already have and a pink color that is kind of like a hot pink, also from Nyx Cosmetics. It still isn’t what I am looking for, but it is a pretty cool color. I am already dreaming up all kinds of ways to use these shades to create a variety of new looks. I have developed a bit of an addiction to makeup arts recently and am having a lot of fun with the whole process.

The rest of the evening was spent driving to Venice to get Chinese food from the drive-through Panda Express they have there, then coming home and watching “New Moon.” My Mom had been pretty anxious to see it because she recently finished reading the entire “Twilight” book series. I really liked “New Moon” much better as a film than as a book. I also really liked the “New Moon” film much better than the “Twilight” film. Don’t get me wrong, I liked “Twilight,” but “New Moon” just seemed so much more cohesive as a film and told the story considerably better than “Twilight” did. Plus, Taylor Lautner was much more heavily featured in this film than Robert Pattinson, and I just find him considerably more appealing. Not only is he considerably more physically attractive but he is considerably more interesting and compelling on-screen and I think he has a much brighter future in film than anybody else in the “Twilight” series, (except possibly Anna Kendrick, but she is barely featured in the “Twilight” films, anyway.) Overall, it was a pretty good day. I spent more money than I should have and had a mini-freak out about it, but my Mom was extremely gracious and figured out a way to work with me on it. I just hate it because it was really a matter of my own stupid actions and thoughtlessness causing trouble for me. It makes me feel really foolish. Fortunately, my Mom is amazing in countless ways and managed to calm me down about it, because I was having a bit of a conniption. We also got some really amazing news on Friday about our apartment. We were concerned that we were going to have to move because our initial deal with the apartment complex was that our rent would go up at the end of the current lease and we couldn’t really afford the hike it was going to take, but we spoke with management and they cut us a deal for another 13-month lease at the same rate, which is amazing of them and really amazing news for us! I guess now we should actually take the time to decorate this place because we never did in the past year of living here. We also got another piece of absolutely amazing news today from my brother, but I am not going to share that here because it is still very new and kind of on the down-low – as soon as I am at liberty to discuss it, though, I surely will because it is amazing and I am really ecstatic for all parties involved. It was actually a really good day, now that I think about it. The best part, though, is that I feel normal again. I hate being sick and I have now been sick twice in the past month. No more – I will not allow myself to get sick like this again! The only means of prevention I have is sheer will power but, fortunately for me, I have that in heaps! I don’t know… I feel really good, looking back on this day. Things are going well for me and it would serve me well to remind myself of that more often. Where does it all go from here? Well, in the words of The Veronicas, “Anywhere is good enough, hook me up!”