Chapter 177: Then Again

I woke up at 1:30pm again today. I don’t know why I keep doing that but I dislike it. I know that it is up to me to change it but for some reason I just keep letting it happen on the weekend. Despite the fact that it is already 3am and I am just starting this post, I don’t intend to let it happen tomorrow. It was kind of a busy day, in some ways. I wouldn’t really call it busy because busy implies I had a lot of things I needed to do, which was not the case, I just did a lot. Like I said, I woke up at 1:30pm and found a voicemail from my sister on my phone. A friend of ours had mentioned to us multiple times over the past couple of weeks that there was this 80s-themed party going on tonight that he wanted us to come to, so we had planned on going to that, but my sister was saying in the voicemail that she planned to come pick me up around 4:30pm or so. I got up, did my usual morning routine, and dicked around online for a while. My Mom’s boyfriend is in town this weekend, so she was already out of the house and off with him. Yesterday I downloaded a few movies to watch on the computer over the weekend, as has kind of become tradition the weekends that he comes. It’s not that I try to avoid interacting with them – I just feel like it is best to kind of stay out of the way and leave them to do their own thing. So, to keep myself entertained, I tend to download movies to watch. I have discovered some of my very favorite movies that way. This weekend, I downloaded a couple that I have been really dying to see and one that I really don’t know much about but was curious just based on the title and brief description. First, I downloaded the movie “Nine,” which I have been dying to see since before it came out. “Nine” is a musical about an Italian film director who is having trouble piecing together his newest film. The story really examines his relationships with the nine most important women in his life. The cast of this movie is reason enough to want to see it – Daniel Day-Lewis, Nicole Kidman, Penelope Cruz, Kate Hudson, Sophia Loren, Dame Judi Dench, Marion Cotillard and Fergie. It looks amazing, although the reviews were not very good for it. Most people complained about the fact that the music is not very strong and it lacks all the elements of a great musical. I have listened to the soundtrack and I agree that the music isn’t the best but I am still pretty excited to see the film itself. I also downloaded probably the movie I have looked forward to the most of everything that came out in 2009, designer Tom Ford’s directorial debut, “A Single Man.” This movie stars Colin Firth as a gay man in the 60s, whose partner has recently died, on the day that he has decided to commit suicide. It is an amazing concept and, considering it is Tom Ford, should be a beautiful film to look at. I have heard so many great things about it and between Tom Ford as director and Colin Firth starring, I can’t imagine it won’t be completely brilliant. I am very excited to watch that one. The third, the one I don’t really know much about, is a movie called “The Big Gay Musical.” The synopsis says that it is the story of two men who are starring in an Off-Broadway musical about a gay couple who are trying to deal with the fact that one of them is closeted and having trouble reconciling his sexuality with his Christian faith and how the two actors offstage lives mirror the show itself. I love the concept of a film about a stage show. I also love the fact that the show they are doing is clearly based on “Next Fall,” the show that Elton John produced, which is currently running on Broadway, (although “Next Fall” isn’t actually a musical.) It looks like a lot of fun and should definitely be worth watching. I like to keep up with the gay cinema, and this sounds like a pretty good one. I had initially planned to watch one of these movies before my sister came to pick me up but I wound up dicking around for too long and needed to take a shower and get myself ready for the day.

I showered, shaved and got myself dressed. As I was putting on my makeup for the day, my sister showed up. I wasn’t sure if we were planning on coming back to my house at all, so I decided to go ahead with my 80s look for tonight. My sister pointed out that this was a bad idea because it was ridiculously hot outside. I was already partway through doing it, so I decided to go ahead. As it turns out, she was absolutely right and that makeup was looking a hot mess within a couple hours of being out. We decided to go out to lunch, and went to Jersey Mike’s Subs, which was very tasty. While we were there, I asked if we could stop by the Dark Side Comics, where my friend Devin works and where today was Free Comic Book Day. Most of my closest friends hang out in this place regularly and I have hung out there and played random games a few times myself. It is a lot of fun. One friend of mine had told me about Free Comic Book Day and that there was a Lady Gaga comic book that was coming out and that they had a free preview version for Free Comic Book Day. He set aside a copy of it for me, so I went in to pick it up and just kind of look around a bit. It was a mess in there, though. I was trying to find the friend who set aside the comic book for me to say thank you but I couldn’t find him anywhere. So, I took my Gaga comic and left. My sister also decided that if we were going to this 80s party, we should at least try to find something 80s looking to wear, so we went down to one of our many local Goodwill stores. She found this really cool, old school suit jacket with big shoulder pads in it and I found a really bright teal and white sparkly sweatervest that I thought would work for a sort of “Valley Girl” inspired look. “Valley Girl” was one of my favorite movies from when I was a kid and I figured it would make for a good inspiration. We also stopped by Wal-Mart to look for really loud colored solid t-shirts to go under these things. I bought a cool green colored crew neck tee, that didn’t wind up working for the outfit but I will probably wind up wearing on it’s own. By this point it was about 8pm and we went to Target and dicked around there for a while. It was nearly 9:30pm by the time my sister dropped me off back at home so I could redo my makeup and change into my outfit. I did a REALLY over-the-top makeup look using teal, pink, purple and gold and paired my teal sweatervest with this pale aqua colored Calvin Klein t-shirt I had. It worked out but wasn’t the best 80s look possible. Still, the “Valley Girl” influence was definitely there.

When we got to the bar where this party was taking place, we found that a lot of people actually wound up dressing up and they were doing 80s karaoke and everything. My sister and I were both not necessarily looking forward to this and weren’t sure how long we were going to stay but it actually wound up being a lot of fun. I even got to sing the quintessential 80s anthem – “Don’t Stop Believing,” by Journey. I have never been a big fan of Journey but I have loved that song ever since I saw the movie “Joe Dirt,” which I know is a random place to pick up that song from but it’s all I’ve got. Of course, I also love the “Glee” version of that song and kind of sang it more in the “Glee” way than the Steve Perry way. This was really good for me, though, because it gave me a chance to be singing on a microphone and with backing music. I was actually surprised at how well I felt like it went. It was funny because a lot of those vocal imperfections I have been talking about lately in the videos I have been making didn’t seem to be present. I mean, there were definitely imperfections but they weren’t like in my “Glee” audition video or in some of the videos I’ve been doing lately. I wonder if that may have something to do with the fact that I was standing up, as opposed to sitting down as I was in my “Glee” video and in most of my daily videos. I’m going to maybe try doing them standing up this coming week to see if that makes a difference. I am wondering if I shouldn’t maybe try doing them with some of the karaoke videos on YouTube, as well. That could make a difference, as well. I don’t know about all that but I know that I was pretty happy with my vocal performance in this random, small bar karaoke setting. Why couldn’t I have done it like that in my “Glee” video. Of course, I am also beginning to wonder if I haven’t gotten to a point where singing songs by female artists doesn’t suit my voice anymore. Honestly, I probably got to that point ages ago but I am finally recognizing it now. It just sucks because most of the music I listen to and love is by female artists. The issue is, really, that I need to learn how to put those songs into my own male voice. That has always been an odd concept to me – finding my own voice. When I sing the songs that I have written myself, I sing them in my own voice but for some reason when singing somebody else’s song I always end up trying to emulate the original artist’s vocals. People have always told me, when doing Open Mic Nights and such, that I sound so much better when I am singing my own songs than when I am doing karaoke or singing an a capella cover, which I have always done at Open Mic Nights before doing my own song, (because doing somebody else’s song kind of eases my nerves before doing one of my own.) I don’t know. I think what this is really telling me is that I need to start performing more of my own songs instead of those of others. Interesting concept – I may have to look into this further.

Like I said, we wound up having a lot of fun at the 80s party and it felt really good to get out and socialize with some of my friends who I don’t really get to see outside of work and such very often. Of course, throughout the 80s party, I was hearing a lot from some of my other friends who I don’t get to see often, namely Whitney and April. Whitney and I have been talking a lot more lately, which is a very good thing. I have talked to April much more frequently than before, as well, and I am very happy about it. I have really missed them both. Tonight we weren’t talking under the best circumstances, unfortunately, but it is really good to have the bond between us renewed. Still, there is a very rough situation going on right now, which I am not going to go into details about here, and it is a lot to deal with. It kind of took me right out of the fun 80s mood and placed me back here in reality. I had a pretty long talk with Whitney tonight and I felt really good about it. After talking to Whitney, I visited one of my favorite music sites, (and one of the few that are still functioning, as it seems many of my favorite music blogs have been taken down recently,) and found a few new things that I am pretty excited about. I downloaded the International Version of Lady Gaga’s “The Remix.” I had found this record a couple months ago as a Japan Only version, which featured two remixes of each single from “The Fame” and three remixes each of “Bad Romance” and “Telephone.” It was pretty good but I’m not one of those people who can sit there and listen to multiple remixes of the same song over and over. This International Version of the album is much better because it features one remix of each single from “The Fame,” as well as individual remixes of a couple of the album tracks, and one remix each of four different tracks from “The Fame Monster,” “Bad Romance,” “Telephone,” “Alejandro” and “Dance In The Dark.” Then there are a few bonus remixes of some of the same songs tacked on at the end. It just feels much more like listening to an album than listening to different versions of the same song over and over. I also found the new album from Diana Vickers, from X Factor 2008, called “Songs From The Tainted Cherry Tree.” I haven’t listened to this one yet and am not sure what to expect from it because I wasn’t really a huge fan of hers on X Factor. Still, I heard a couple of random songs from her post-X Factor and was impressed with them, so we’ll see. The third and best thing that I downloaded was the new self-titled debut album from Court Yard Hounds. Court Yard Hounds, for those who don’t know, is the side project of Emily Robison and Martie Maguire of the Dixie Chicks. The Dixie Chicks are one of my all-time favorite bands and I will pretty much always follow anything any of them do. I was particularly curious about this project because it includes lead vocals by Emily Robison, who has long been my favorite Dixie Chick. The Dixie Chicks have always been Natalie Maines doing lead and the other two doing backup, so I was very interested in seeing what it would be like having Emily on lead vocals. Let me tell you – it’s a good thing. Her voice is gorgeous. It is very reminiscent of Sheryl Crow. In fact, the album is pretty reminiscent of Sheryl Crow, actually. I have listened to this album twice in a row now and am pretty much in love with it. It is a gorgeous record start to finish. Eleven of the twelve songs were written by Emily Robison. The other song was written by Martie Maguire. The song that Martie wrote is called “Gracefully,” and she also sings lead on it. It is honestly one of my favorite songs on the record. It is a beautiful, heartbreaking song about the end of a relationship and just wanting to be able to leave gracefully. The entire album is brilliant. My favorite track is probably “Then Again,” which includes a simple, one line chorus of “Then again, I never did understand me.” One of the lines that I love the most says, “I can forgive any Tom, Dick or Harry, but when it comes to me I never can forgive myself.” It is just so universally true. Every one of us in this world does that, it seems. The song is really very universally true – one of the things that we all have the most trouble with in life is truly coming to understand ourselves. Another favorite of mine is “The Fear Of Wasted Time,” which is about exactly what the title states. This is a song that I can relate to a lot, as well. As the song describes, I am a person who has a lot of trouble slowing down. I am constantly trying to do something productive, something to capture the moment in time and, as the songs says, “you ask why I do it that way, it’s just the fear of wasted time.” Nobody wants to look back on their life and only see time that didn’t amount to anything. Other favorites include, “Skyline,” “The Coast,” “Delight (Something New Under The Sun,)” “Fairytale,” and “I Miss You.” Two other songs I simply must mention are “Ain’t No Son,” which I was thoroughly impressed with, and “See You In The Spring,” which is a duet with the AMAZING Jakob Dylan. “Ain’t No Son” impressed me a lot because it is a very bold statement to make on what would technically be considered a country record. This song is about a father dismissing his son for not being a “real man.” It isn’t stated but pretty well implied that he is gay or effeminate in some way. Country radio doesn’t take kindly to such liberal views, in general, as evidenced by the insane boycott the Dixie Chicks faced after criticizing the Bush administration. “See You In The Spring” is another breakup type song about not wanting to say goodbye. I just love this song because of the presence of Jakob Dylan, an artist who I absolutely love. His voice is just so gravelly and has this really rough, emotional depth to it and it compliments Emily’s voice brilliantly. I really can’t say enough good things about this album. Don’t be put off by the “country” label because it seriously doesn’t really sound country. It sounds much more rootsy, almost bluesy, singer/songwriter style. It is an amazing album and I definitely recommend everybody check it out – you will not be disappointed.

It is now 4:40am and I simply must get to bed. After all, I do not plan on waking up in the PM hours tomorrow and if I have any hopes of making that happen I need to get to sleep immediately. It was a really good day, overall, and I had a lot of fun hanging out with my sister and getting all 80s’ed out. I also found out that I will need to try to move my piano lesson this week because my sister isn’t going to be available to take me for my normal Wednesday lesson, so I need to call Viktor tomorrow and hopefully get it moved to Monday night instead. Last time I was able to do that and it worked out really well. In fact, I kind of preferred Monday because I was able to make my appointment for 7pm instead of 6:30pm. Still, Wednesday works out well for me because it gives me something to look forward to right in the middle of the week. Hopefully there won’t be an issue with moving the lesson this week. I know the Allegro Academy has some pretty strict rules about this stuff but I don’t think my moved lesson last time counted against me at all so hopefully that won’t be the case this time, either. Either way, I will make sure to handle that tomorrow. In the meantime, I need to go to bed immediately. Goodnight.