Chapter 173: Disgusting

Last night my Mom and I didn’t speak a word about working out today. In all honesty, I hadn’t really thought much about it because I was so focused on having achieved my musical goals for the day. Still, working out is just as important as music. Okay, so maybe not JUST AS important. On my list of priorities for my life, losing weight definitely falls below music… not THAT far below, though. If I shifted my focus, as far as weight loss goes, I would see how the two really go hand-in-hand. For one, music for me covers a lot more than singing – it also covers a certain level of performance. A very important element of performance is fashion and if I want to get to a point where I can fit into the type of fashion I want to convey I need to lose weight. Therefore, working out really kind of falls into the list of my daily musical goals. I need to remind myself of that often. I don’t know why I never made this connection before. It really makes a LOT of sense. This kind of makes me look at the whole workout routine in a completely different way. Perhaps what I have needed all along, as far as working out goes, was as simple as a new perspective on it! In any sense, as I mentioned, we didn’t discuss working out today amidst all of our conversation last night, so when I woke up this morning I wasn’t sure what to expect from my Mom as far as that goes. I woke up with my alarm, at 7:30am, and got out of bed, washed my face with Clean & Clear Morning Burst facial cleanser, brushed my teeth, smoked a couple cigarettes, drank coffee and dicked around online until about 8am. My Mom asked me if I wanted to work out and without really considering it I said yes. I went out to the living room and she was saying that her back was hurting her. I told her we didn’t have to workout if she didn’t want to but she pushed ahead. Turns out, we had a really great workout this morning. My Mom even told me that her back felt considerably better after the workout. It was a really good thing and I am really glad that we did it. In fact, I just talked to my Mom about the whole thing and I really feel very re-invigorated for the whole workout routine! I’m excited to work out tomorrow morning now!

Speaking of exercise and such, my work has been talking for a while now about this competition they are having with the other locations our company has, where people sign up to carry a pedometer for a month and whichever location has the most steps gets some sort of prize. Nobody is really clear on what the prize is but that’s not really the important part. I think my entire department has signed up to do it. I think it’s a pretty cool thing. I learned today that, in order to kick off the whole thing, they have organized a walk in downtown Sarasota, starting at Marina Jack’s and going over the Ringling Bridge. That is happening this weekend and I would really like to go do it. My Mom and I have talked a lot about going and walking the bridge on our own so why not take our first shot at it with a whole group of people? I think it’d be pretty cool. I mentioned it to my Mom and she seems interested but she also pointed out that it is a pretty damn long walk. This is why I think it is a good idea to do it in a big group because there are a lot of people to motivate each other to keep going on. I also know that a few of my co-workers will be going so I’d have people that I know there. It could be a lot of fun. Of course, it is also taking place at 10:30am on a Saturday… so, there’s that. I don’t know about getting up in time to go walking over a long ass bridge at 10:30am on a Saturday. Still, it could be a really fun and healthy way to spend a Saturday morning. It could also be a good way to avoid going out and spending money this weekend, considering I have to pay for the next month of piano lessons this paycheck and really can’t afford to go out shopping like I did last paycheck, no matter how much I may want to.

So, today at work was pretty laid back. I spent most of the day decorating the random calendar they hand out to us every month, then decorating the calendars for a bunch of my co-workers. In the midst of all of this, I also managed to write two new songs today. Much like yesterday, there was one that was slightly more frivolous and poppy, called “This Beat,” which was basically a song about repeating a pattern of bad relationships and learning that my heart really belongs to “the beat.” It’s a dance song about how music is really my one true love. It is really poppy but not all that frivolous, I suppose, considering that is really how I live my life. The second song I wrote today was called “Let The Darkness Come,” which is about having trouble getting through the day and waiting for the night to come so you can leave the day behind. It’s kind of similar in theme to the song I wrote yesterday, “Steam,” but I kind of like this one better. As the title implies, it’s darker. My Mom and I took our first break together and started to walk the parking lot but my body felt really sore and the pants I wore today didn’t fit right, so I asked to stop walking before we made our way through the whole parking lot. I just felt really drained and kind of achy. I’m not sure what it was but that feeling kind of stuck around through much of the day. I didn’t feel as mentally exhausted today as I did yesterday but my body felt much more tired than it really had reason to. I don’t know why that was but it was annoying. My fellow evening shift worker called in sick tonight and I was worried that I may end up getting stuck on the phone late and not being able to get a ride home with my Mom. Fortunately, I only got out a few minutes late and it wouldn’t really have been a problem. It REALLY wasn’t a problem because my sister was there and offered to take me home instead, so my Mom wouldn’t have to leave and risk getting back from break late. When I got home I downloaded a little music and recorded my singing video for today. I did the song “With Every Heartbeat” by Robyn, which I changed the arrangement on a bit to perform at an Open Mic Night a long time ago. I figured since I wasn’t likely to wind up at any Open Mic Nights anytime all that soon, I may as well go ahead and do it as one of my random videos. It went pretty well, although I did spot a few weak spots scattered throughout. I was also going to make dinner, Tuna Helper, but we didn’t have enough milk to do that.

When my Mom got home, since I hadn’t made any dinner, we decided to go down to Gyros & Seafood and pick up something to eat. My Mom was telling me about her day, which included a couple of things that have her worried. For one, she told me a few days ago that her department at work was eliminating overtime for the moment, which meant that she would not be getting all the extra hours that she has been recently. Sadly, she kind of depended on those hours. Today she also found out that her department was changing to 7 days a week, instead of the normal Monday-Friday with overtime hours on the weekend that they’ve been doing. Apparently, everyone in her department is now required to work one weekend day every week. She is very upset about this because the weekend is normally when she goes to see her boyfriend. I don’t think it’s a bad thing, though, in all honesty. If her boyfriend comes down here instead of her going to his house they could still see each other nearly as much as they do now, and it would give her a day off during the week to focus on trying to find a “real job.” I think it could wind up working out really well for her. Now it is a matter of figuring which weekend day she is going to work and which weekday she is going to take off. I think she is going to try for having Friday and Saturday off, which would probably work out best for her. We’ll see, though. Either way, I’m not freaking out over it and I don’t think she should be, either. Still, I understand it is pretty stressful. Plus, her department took away the overtime previously and gave it back pretty quickly. I am kind of keeping my fingers crossed that this is what happens this time, as well. I don’t know. I think the best thing for her would be to find a better, higher-paying job. I am keeping my fingers crossed that things manage to work out that way, we’ll see, though.

Aside from all that, I spent this evening watching TV. I skipped through tonight’s “American Idol,” in order to only watch the performances. It was a pretty good week on the show. There is this kid on the show, Aaron Kelley, who is my favorite. I wish he would win but I’m pretty sure he’s not going to. I am pretty disinterested in this season of “American Idol,” honestly, but I have watched this far I may as well follow it to the end. What I am definitely NOT disinterested in right now is the best show on television, “Glee.” Tonight’s episode saw the return of Kristin Chenoweth as a guest star, and that just made “Glee” all that much better than it already was. This episode also barely featured Lea Michele’s character, Rachel Berry. A lot of fans on Oh No They Didn’t and various other sites have talked a lot about how they feel like the show focuses far too much on her and neglects some of the other extremely talented stars in the cast. I never really thought that, although I can see where people would think that. I think it is just because I absolutely LOVE Lea Michele. However, tonight’s episode where she only had a few lines was one of the best episodes of the show so far. It was really amazing. It focused a lot on one of my other favorite characters, Kurt Hummel, and even featured him doing an AMAZING rendition of the Burt Bacharach classic, “A House Is Not A Home.” That is one of the greatest songs ever written and this kid sang it beautifully. The episode also featured a really gorgeous rendition of Christina Aguilera’s “Beautiful,” sung by Amber Riley, who has one of the best voices on the show. She is amazing. I was doubly impressed because you hear a lot of people trying to sing Christina Aguilera songs and they can never compare, however Amber Riley absolutely did Christina justice. It was amazing. Speaking of Christina Aguilera, the video for her first single from her album, “Bionic,” is premiering on Friday. There was a little preview snippet on her website today and it looks insanely brilliant! I am really excited to see this – more excited than I have been for a music video in a long time. Aside from Gaga, it seems like people don’t put the effort into making pop videos like they used to. It’s a shame, too, because pop videos used to be the most amazing shit ever.

It is almost 1am and I really should get to bed. Before I do, though, there is one last thing I need to discuss. After my foray into Nickelodeon stuff this weekend with “Victorious” and Victoria Justice, I decided to give a shot to another Nickelodeon star – Miranda Cosgrove, from “iCarly.” Once again, I saw her on “The View” and was intrigued. Despite how funny looking she is, I thought she was really cute and charming and the clip of her song that they played sounded really cute. I still have no interest in watching “iCarly,” but I downloaded her album and cannot stop listening to it. I downloaded it after work and am now listening to it for the fourth time in a row. It’s really fun, spunky pop music. It is a really well-written, well put together album, full of guitar based dance-pop. It is a lot of fun and I am really loving it. She even does a cover of one of Ke$ha’s leaked demos from earlier in her career, when she was just writing for others, called “Disgusting.” This is one of my favorite songs that Ke$ha has done and I was initially kind of put off with the way Miranda Cosgrove delivered it but as I keep listening to it I keep liking it more and more. The album is full of really solid pop songs. My personal favorites are “Shakespeare,” “There Will Be Tears,” “Oh Oh,” “Daydream,” “Brand New You,” “What Are You Waiting For,” and “Beautiful Mess.” It really is an extremely solid pop record and I really love it. Don’t worry, I do feel ashamed. I can’t help myself, though – I am a sucker for good pop music. It is 1:01am. I need to go to bed. Goodnight.