Chapter 360: That's The Way It Is

OMG so let me preface this blog post by saying that I am really fucked up right now. I mean, I'm slowly sobering up but not actually being sober yet. It's weird, right? I don't know. Unlike the past two days when I was fucked up or whatever, I can'lt push tonight's blog off to tomorrow morning because I won't have time for it. I have to do this now, even though I am really in no condition to be doing this now. I think I am going to have ONE more drink before I fall sleep, to help me fall asleep better or something. I still have hunch punch from my party and I may as well be drinking a little bit more of it before bed. Right? There is no harm in that, I don't think. So, initially the plan was that I had to have some party on Saturday night & then have recovery time on Sunday. The issue is that I still was drunk when I got up Sunday morning. No harm, no fowl, though. But then I remembered that two of my fucking BFFs were having a party tonight & I was invited. I wasn't sure if I would go because I wasn't sure if I would have a ride over there or how I would get home, but I figured it out and I went over there and drank like 3 or 4 beers and a water bottle full of hunch punch and the hunch punch I'm drinking right now and some other stuff. It was a mess in all the best ways and I am so glad that I did it. It was fun! Halloween is amazing! I have decided that this year has been the best Halloween ever because I have spent this whole weekend being fucking shitty and having a fucking good time and using the f word in my blog a LOT! There's some other stuff that I would totally talk about but it's a fucking secret. Like a "don't say this in the blog" type secret, cos' people will know. So, secrets are safe with me - even when I am drunk as fuck.

there are only 5 days left of this blog now and I don't even understand what I am writing here. It is crazy! I am wasting away the last days of my blog getting all fucked up. At the same time, though, isn't that what this whole blog was about in the first place? Not about getting fucked up but about going out and living my fucking life and shit. It IS! I needed to fucking get a life really bad anyway so it is good that I'm fucking doing stuff in the world right now. I mean, right now I'm not doing anything good in the world, I'm just fucking getting fucked up but that IS something that I'm doing in the world. Living life. Livin' La Vida Loca or some shit. Ricky Martin is a homosexual. There are a lot of us out in the world. Some are super obvious, like me, but some are hidden. Some don't even realize it about themselves. Some are fuking lost. I feel bad for them. I don't want them to get left behind in this world. It makes me so sad. On the way home, in the car, my iPod played that song by Celine Dion, "That's The Way It Is," and while I was listening to that song I was like, "HOLY SHIT, THAT's the fucking truth!!!" Really, it is. Don't give up on your faith. Love comes to those who believe it & that's the way it is. It is fucking true. I have not given up on my faith. Sure, it's not going in the direction I want it to yet but I believe in it - I have faith in it. Love is coming to me and I can't wait! Sure, I hate waiting around but at the same time, I know that it will be worth waiting for. Fucking magic. Fucking fireworks and shit. It is totally happening and it is going to be fucking beautiful. I am so excited. For now, though, I have to finish my drink and go to bed. If I am not ready in the morning my sister is going to kill me. I almost wish that I could call in sick tomorrow but I totally cannot. It just can't happen. So, I'd better get to bed. Goodnight! Bottom's up! No, wait... I'm a bottom. Bottom's down!